Co-Parenting & Custody Glossary

Plain-English definitions of the terms that come up most when you're co-parenting — custody schedules, legal basics, and shared-expense language. General information, not legal advice.

Co-parenting

Two separated, divorced, or never-married parents sharing the responsibilities of raising their child(ren) across two households.

Parenting plan

A written agreement (sometimes court-ordered) that sets out the custody schedule, decision-making, holidays, and how expenses are shared.

Physical custody

Where the child lives. Can be joint (shared between homes) or primary (mostly one home).

Legal custody

Who makes major decisions for the child — schooling, medical, religion. Often joint even when physical custody isn't 50/50.

50/50 custody

An arrangement where children spend roughly equal time with each parent. Common patterns include 2-2-3, week-on/week-off, and 2-2-5-5.

2-2-3 schedule

A 50/50 rotation: two days with one parent, two with the other, then a three-day weekend that alternates. Frequent contact; good for younger kids.

Week-on / week-off

A 50/50 rotation where each parent has the children for a full week at a time. Fewest handoffs; often suits older kids.

2-2-5-5

Each parent has the same two fixed weekdays every week, with alternating five-day blocks. Predictable plus longer stretches.

Nesting (bird's-nest custody)

The children stay in one home and the parents rotate in and out, rather than the children moving between two homes.

Handoff / exchange

The moment custody passes from one parent to the other. A neutral location and a clear schedule reduce friction.

Right of first refusal

A clause giving the other parent the chance to care for the child before a babysitter is used, when a parent is unavailable during their time.

Parenting time

The scheduled time a child spends with each parent (the modern term for "visitation").

Custody swap

A temporary trade of scheduled days between parents — best handled as a logged request both agree to.

Child support

Court-ordered payments from one parent to the other to help cover a child's living costs. Separate from how parents split discretionary shared expenses.

Shared expenses

Costs both parents contribute to — childcare, medical, activities, school — typically split by an agreed method.

Income-proportional split

Dividing a shared cost in the same ratio as the parents' incomes (e.g., 60/40) rather than evenly, so each contributes an equal share of their means.

Income shares model

The approach many states use to calculate child support, based on both parents' combined income and time with the child.

Reimbursement

One parent paying the other back for their share of a cost the first parent fronted.

Mediation

A neutral third party helping co-parents reach agreement without going to court.

Court-ready records

Timestamped, organized documentation of expenses, approvals, and schedule changes that can be presented if a dispute escalates.

Blended family

A family formed when one or both parents bring children from a previous relationship into a new household.

Parallel parenting

A low-contact approach for high-conflict situations, where parents minimize direct communication and coordinate through neutral tools or schedules.

BIFF

A communication method — Brief, Informative, Friendly, Firm — for keeping co-parenting messages businesslike and low-conflict.

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